The Art of Earning Curmudgeon Cred

Anyone can be nice, but there’s an art to gaining credibility while being not-so-nice. (Really, these lines of distinction are useful in a number of fields and applications. It’s an exercise in understanding the tone of your language, and how people are more likely to receive your criticisms.)

The very stance of curmudgeonhood is one that can bring instant credibility, but you have to be careful or it will not last. If you are mean just for the sake of being mean, you will not do anything for your own reputation. You may in fact turn off the very people you are trying to influence.

From High Fives to Face Slaps

During the earliest days of Social Media, those pushing the technologies were almost optimistic to a fault. The way to build a name involved linking to the right people, agreeing with the right fundamental theses, and singing the praises of the new open world to come. There was very little space for the naysayer.

Now, one of the best ways to make a splash and establish an identity is to be as cynical as possible. There’s nothing wrong with being skeptical, as long as you are being productive.

Attributes of a successful curmudgeon:

  • Honest – Say what needs to be said, and don’t hold back for feelings
  • Direct – Identify the elements that need correction
  • Hopeful – Write in a spirit that what you see as wrong can be made better

Negative attributes of an unsuccessful curmudgeon:

  • Brutal – Say what needs to be said, taking opportunities for cheap shots
  • Pointed – Identify opportunities to heap additional blame than is required
  • Gleeful – Write in a way that celebrates the failure

Those who exercise curmudgeonhood for their own benefit (like those who would attack big targets, just to generate search engine linkbait) will tend to burn themselves out. Those who are truly interested in improvement instead of destruction may in fact enhance their reputation. Tone matters.

(Per my writing experiment, here’s how it unfolded.)
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An Experiment in the Process of Writing

I was wondering what Wave might be good for, then it struck me. It might be a window into the process of composition.

I recently wrote a post about writing, which ended up with a clever little turn as I tied everything back to the theme of the chicken and the the egg. It became the Chicken’s Guide to Writing a Better Blog Post.

Like many posts I am remain proud of, it was internally consistent and coherent, but not because it started that way. What you saw was still the finished product, and it is hard to separate the original sparks from the final polish when all you see is a post that is temporally “flat.”

What we need, if we truly want to get into the writing process, is a means of seeing the revisions as they happen. While WordPress does support multiple revisions of documents, there is no easy way to publish them all simultaneously.

Then I thought it might be instructive to do a Wiki, as you can spend all the time you want comparing revisions and seeing how the post evolves. But that would be a pain for the reader, and it would not be as evident what was changing, and why.

So in the hopes there would be a way to not bore the reader, I think I will embark on a little experiment. I think I will start writing posts (about writing) in Google Wave, and use it to track the changes in the document. Then, I ought to be able to showcase the changes, as I move bits and pieces of text around to suit my needs. I can start with the outline of the piece (where one exists, and in the case of this one, you really are getting stream of consciousness here), and fill in the bullets before filling them out.

Still might be a couple of other hurdles to cross, such as how to display it. Right now, I am hoping there is a way to export a Wave in motion – and if there isn’t, I can always play it back as a Jing screencast. Then embed it with the finished post.

Who knows, maybe *I* will learn something about how I write, once I see the playbacks.

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The Chicken’s Guide to Writing a Better Blog Post

nest

There’s the short answer:

Fill in the empty parts until they aren’t empty, then hit “Publish.”

Then there’s the long answer. The process involves a number of steps you’ve considered, but you need the discipline to imprint it into your workflow. (oh… and this isn’t just for blogs, either.)

Lay the Egg

Every good blog post is an exercise in giving birth. You take a germ of an idea, something with your specific DNA, and you nurture it to completion.

Conversely, hatching someone else’s eggs makes you look weak in comparison, as you’re just promulgating someone else’s heritage. Be yourself, speak from your experiences and ideas.

Fit the Nest to the Egg

…not the egg to the nest.

  • A good blog post should be roughly 400-600 words.
  • You should only board with a single carry-on bag.
  • Your car should ideally weigh 1,823 pounds.
  • Your third child should have its arms and legs removed, to get you to 2.4 children.

Each one sounds progressively more absurd, but they all come from the same fallacy: an artificially-imposed restriction. There is no optimal length for your post, because only you can decide when you’ve exhausted the material to the level of detail you require. Yes, your 2,400 word novella can indeed bore a reader into submission, but you can just as easily bore them in 400.

Size doesn’t matter. Pixels are cheap, and you aren’t bound by the restrictions of print publications or rigid television time constraints. Say what you need to say, and let your passion expand to fill the prose.

Paint the Egg

If you’re giving the reader a lot of information, respect the way they navigate the page. Break up the post with visual elements that act as mileposts, so as they scroll down the page they can see the progress they’re making.

  • Bullets work for this
  • So do images
  • Pull quotes are great
  • Subheads are even better, because they communicate a structure

Look at an egg. Now spin it around in your hand. If it looks the same at every angle, how do you know when you’ve completed a full revolution?

Think about how you read. If you are scrolling through a page that is nothing but text, you can get lost. But if you know where you are with relation to that image on the screen, it’s easy to recover from a distraction and get back into the piece.

Don’t count on your sidebar to play that role. Readers tune out sidebars completely when they engage with your essay. Your visual signpost needs to be within that 600-pixel-wide content box.

When you preview what you’ve written, scroll through it. If you ever encounter a section that doesn’t contain an element for visual cues, then add something. Preferably something of value.

Paint the egg, add a decal… something that tells us we’re moving.

Hatch an Experience

People respond well to narratives, because story gives context while fact shivers naked in the cold.

Want to know what the original subheads of this piece were?

  • Hatch the Egg
  • Let it Breathe
  • Break it Up
  • Tell a Story
  • Tie Loose Ends
  • Start at the End

Those were very functional headings, but they didn’t drive a narrative. Once I went through my “Polishing Pass” (see below), I saw an opportunity to weave the chicken and egg theme throughout this post. It came to me as an after-thought, like many good ideas do. (And voila, I also now have a story to include in this post, which is already meta beyond hope.)

If there isn’t a real opportunity to insert a story, at least write the way you talk. When you write for academics or search engines, you end up meeting their expectations.

Dry and formulaic are no way to go through life, son.

Tidy the Shell Fragments

You are going back and previewing, aren’t you?

This is different than the typical proofreading pass for spelling and grammar. (And based on what I see published, too many of you believe spell-check will fix your there/they’re and lose/loose problems.)

This is the time to read for theme and tone.

  • Did you maintain a consistent voice?
  • Is your tone uniform?
  • Did you bring your reader to a satisfying conclusion?

I like a lot of the first instincts I have about what I write. But on the “polishing pass,” I look for opportunities to bring the post to a new level. Sometimes I’ll have a great beginning and ending, but missed a chance to extend the overall analogy to the middle points. You might have a post that starts with “X” but ends in “Y,” when really it is more interesting to bring things full-circle. Maybe start with “X” and end on “X-prime.”

Comedians refer to those hooks as “tie-backs.” The punchline you deliver early on can re-emerge during a crescendo conclusion with an altered meaning. It builds layers into your communication, and in the case of the comedian reminds the audience of something they thought was funny a while ago. Successful comics weave several tie-backs into the final minute, so the audience walks away remembering the highlights of the performance. Which leads us to…

Which Comes First…

…the chicken or the Egg?

Start with your End, or at least fake it.

Whether you are doing a speech, a Powerpoint presentation, a blog post or a story, you need to leave your audience with a takeaway. Have in mind the one thing you want them to remember, and strive to make that point.

Sometimes it takes you 2,000 words to make the case and share the evidence.

Sometimes it takes but a sentence.

But leave them with a single takeaway. If you have to, go back and tweak the introduction to properly set up the piece and foreshadow the takeaway. Then rewrite the title to describe the benefit, not state it.

Dear chicken, it’s not about you. It’s about the egg. Serve the egg, and you’ll be asked to produce more.

The Crowdsourced Looking Glass

We don’t really need a Reason to Be, but it certainly helps to occasionally step back and look at a larger picture.

What is Occam’s RazR?

What do I want it to be?

It’s not what we saw from the first incarnation of the “personal weblog.” I don’t share everything here. I have Facebook, and a Twitter account that I use for short thoughts. (I even started a “My Quotes” category to archive the witty pieces that shouldn’t be so ephemeral.)

I have a Posterous site, “Ike’s Online Scraptacular,” for the pieces that don’t fit in other places.

I occasionally contribute at Media Bullseye and Calling John Galt, so as not to litter this space with thoughts in niches.

So if I am segmenting my online output, what goes here?

Bucket needs a label

I suppose I need to refocus and answer that.

Or I can take the lazy way out and say “It’s whatever the heck I want it to be about, on any given day.” But that doesn’t help the reader develop a consistent expectation. And even if I don’t have a purpose for this audience, it doesn’t mean I ought to waste its time with scattered meanderings.

So, this is what I will try to live up to:

  • Occam’s RazR will be a site about exploration and explanation.
  • Occam’s RazR will be a site about communication and cognition.
  • I want to write about thinking, and how we can strip away assumptions to arrive at truth.
  • I want to write about writing, and how we can more clearly enunciate what we mean.
  • I want to write about process, and how we delineate what we can understand from what we can’t.
  • I may write about football, or politics, or economics, or television, or any of a host of topics that might seem to emerge from nowhere. But I will always aim for the spirit of revealing the hidden truth, the missing link or the unsupported assumption.
  • I will do my best to bridge from knowns to unknowns.

What am I missing?

I know I am missing elements, but I want them to be explicit and not implicit.

I worked for a news manager once who got a lot of mileage out of sending me to places where news was happening, with the gameplan of “Send Ike there, and let Ike be Ike.”

That’s not enough. I want the outsiders’ perspective of what that means.

So tell me…

Cutting Corners

We’ve got that B-Roll!

“b-roll” is the term used for the video that is brought in after-the-fact to supplement a news story or a commercial.

When I was in television news, it was considered almost sinful to rely too much on file video. We prided ourselves on writing to the video we had, and not pulling generic stuff from the archives.

It was a sign of laziness if one were to write the copy first, then hunt for specific video to make it fit. More often than not, you get a better story by writing to what you experienced and perceived than some generic and stale ideal.

I knew many in the business, though, who were masters at using stale stock video. Some kept their own libraries of traffic, weather, schools and “people walking around.”

The “B” in b-roll doesn’t stand for “bland,” but that’s not a bad guess. It had to do with the early film editing process, where there were two channels being mixed together live on the air. Typically, you’d have the reporter’s narration and the sound bites on the A-channel, and the cover video (with natural sound) on the B-channel.

Modern editing has rendered these notions moot, because non-linear video setups allow for multiple tracks, overdubs, and slowing of video in an instant. Need to trim a little bit of video? No problem. The fancy dissolves and wipes are a cinch, too. Now you don’t have to pay attention to an A-roll and a B-roll, because each little bit is a snippet in its own right, and is sequenced automatically by a processor.

TV’s Future is in the Past

Yet, even with the video innovation, there are two lessons:

1) Jargon never goes away. We will still have “B-Roll” long after the generation who actually edited on film. Ask anyone in a TV newsroom, and they can tell you what B-Roll is, even if they’ve never touched film or can’t explain the origin of the term.

2) B-Roll will never go away. The declining population in newsrooms isn’t going to magically rebound when the economy improves, meaning stations (that survive) will do so by doing more with less. Shooting fresh video can be costly, and if you make a practice of discouraging the travel and time required to acquire video you can shoehorn a little extra “product” out of the crews you have.

And that’s what it is, “product.”

Which makes this fake ad as raucously funny as it is sadly prophetic.

(hat tip to my friend John McQuiston for finding this clip.)