The Internet is a Kennel

By now, many others have weighed in on a very recent online spat, so I won’t go into particulars.

Person A, who is very well known, made a comment that devoid of context came across as arrogant. He didn’t mean it that way.

Person B, who is very well-respected (and less well-known,) wrote about how such interactions and communications can indeed breed incivility online, without naming names.

Person A wrote a scathing open letter to Person B.

Both Person A and Person B are friends of mine. Real friends, not just “online friendz,” with whom I have shared multiple meals and drinks apiece. So this isn’t about them.

This is about the lapdogs who try to curry favor with the Internet Famous.

My Brush With (Internet) Fame

A couple of years ago, I made a reference to Robert Scoble on Twitter. It was really a remark to someone else who was asking about who to follow, and I merely stated that I didn’t follow a lot of the so-called “big names.” Not because I don’t think they are valuable, but because they weren’t valuable to me at the time, and most of Robert’s really good Tweets were being re-tweeted to me anyway. (At that time, you saw all of the interactions and discussions in a user’s stream, which changed over a year ago.)

Scoble caught the indirect reference, then fired off a pithy comment to me. That’s fine. I took it in his typical good-natured spirit.

Then his Minions arrived.

I was pilloried by several people for daring to question the value of the Almighty Robert Scoble. I was asked why I think I am better than he is, and I was questioned about why anyone would bother following me.

You can’t hold Robert Scoble responsible for the actions of his throng – he didn’t call for the rain of error. And in the recent case, neither did Person A. But there is something deeper and telling about the motives and incentives for the Minion Behavior.

Yip Yip Yip

If you want a definition of Minion Behavior, think “Active Sycophant.”

If you want to see Minion Behavior in action, look at this classic clip featuring Spike and Chester.

If you want to understand Minion Behavior, you need to think about what the underlings want from the transaction.

• Attention
  Minions often reach out to the Chosen One in an attempt to be seen. If I can only garner attention, he will see that I am a great person in my own right.
• Transference
  A Minion who is involved in the same conversations as his idol gains esteem from being on the same stage, regardless of whether he is noticed.
• Respect
  The Minion who does an excellent job defending his idol might earn respect, and a special place in the King’s Court.
• Belonging
  Knowing that he is one of many, the Minion finds it safer to run with a pack in which members reinforce each other.

Yes, this is the same behavior that causes angst in the not-old-enough-for-Miley set, and the same insecurities and coping mechanisms remain with us into adulthood. The difference now is that our petty disagreements and posturing are now permanent and searchable — and the Chesters who climb the ladder of Minionhood are able to flock to any virtual street corner to regale their beloved Spikes.

(Note, to those who commented at Person A’s site. Not all of you are Minions. But a lot of you are. And it’s quite likely that you aren’t aware your participation was really rooted in one of the four motives listed above. So, it wasn’t you. Really. But please, start skinning your own cats – you don’t need Spike as much as you think.)

Podcast: Play in new window | Download